Happy Holi to all!

HELP!

I am so confused and lost. I can see it in my room. I can point at the messy bed and say, look I am really lost. I do not want to talk to people. But is sad that I can’t talk. At least I could point out the opposites there. But what about the numerous things which I do not even know exist. I know something is seriously wrong. But I do not trust a shrink. I start doubting everything and then doubt if I am paranoid. Stammers and stutters grow day by day. I am in me and am still looking at me wondering what I am. Did that sentence make any sense? See, I am really confused.